I Lied -The Honest Truth

  

     I'm running from the LAPD.  I lost my drivers license and spent over 2 and a half hours in line at the Los Angeles DMV last week.  When I filled out the application, the State of California wanted to know my weight.   I paused and took my sweet time answering.  Really? Is that even necessary?  After careful consideration, I lied.   But before I lied I contemplated how much to drop.  I really want to drop 40 pounds but that's a little obnoxious and a little obvious.  So I tried to compromise with myself.   I have to carry that damn thing around with me until I lose it again which could be years, so I had to make my answer good and fair, something better but something I could live up to.  Now, according to my new drivers license I weigh about 15 pounds less than I am today.  It's the truth I look forward to, does that count for anything? 

     I'm not sure why they need to know such personal information anyway.  I mean there's no line item or questioning for other physical flaws like "How many zits do you have?", "Do you have any hairy moles?" or "What percentage of your hair is gray?"  It's sort of been weighing on my conscience that I lied on a government application-and that's only because I want to be a good example to my kids.   It just gives me extra incentive to lose the 15 pounds so I won't have to look over my shoulder every time there are sirens or 5-0 nearby and have to explain to my kids why mommy is running from Johnny Law.

     15 pounds...do you think I can accomplish this before it comes in the mail?